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Complete Discussion of Honne and Tatemae in Japanese Life 2024

Tegar Rifqiaulian by Tegar Rifqiaulian
5 April 2025
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Ilustrasi honne dan tatemae

Illustrations of the real and the real

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Have you ever heard the terms honne and tatemae? If you are interested in Japanese culture, these two words must be familiar. The concepts of honne and tatemae are an integral part of Japanese social life, reflecting unique values ​​and ethics.

Table of Contents

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    • What are Honne and Tatemae?
    • Why are Honne and Tatemae Important in Japanese Culture?
    • Examples of Applying Honne and Tatemae in Daily Life
    • The development of the concepts of honne and tatemae
    • Conclusion

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The concepts of honne (本音) and tatemae (建前) are two important pillars in understanding Japanese culture and social behavior. While the direct translation may sound simple – honne as “true feelings” and tatemae as “outward appearance” – these two concepts are much more complex and interrelated than simply comparing truth and pretense. Learning about honne and tatemae is key to understanding the nuances of social interaction in Japan and avoiding misunderstandings that can arise from cultural differences.

What are Honne and Tatemae?

Honest: Honne refers to the true feelings or thoughts, the inner voice of the heart. It is the private side of a person that is usually only revealed to those closest and most trusted.

Honne, the core of one’s self, represents one’s most honest and authentic feelings, thoughts, and desires. It is the inner voice that may not always be expressed openly due to various social and cultural factors. Honne can encompass a range of emotions, from affection and happiness to anger, anxiety, or disapproval. However, it is important to remember that honne is not a license to be rude or impolite. Even when expressing honne, Japanese people generally strive to maintain politeness and harmony. The expression of honne often occurs in very close and trusted environments, such as among family members or close friends. This is where one feels safe to be themselves without fear of judgment.

Tatemae (Pretense): Tatemae is the attitude or action displayed in public, a facade used to maintain social harmony and interpersonal relationships. It is a more formal and polite face, often in contrast to one's honne.

In contrast to honne, tatemae refers to behavior, speech, and actions displayed in public. It is a social facade designed to maintain harmony, avoid conflict, and maintain social hierarchy. Tatemae often involves sacrificing honne for the common good or to maintain good relationships. This does not mean that tatemae are always false or hypocritical. In fact, tatemae is an important form of social etiquette in Japanese society, which values ​​politeness, obedience, and saving face for oneself and others.

However, it is important to understand that tatemae does not mean deception or manipulation. It is more of a subtle and covert communication strategy to avoid direct confrontation and maintain good interpersonal relationships. In a Japanese culture that highly values ​​harmony and avoiding conflict, tatemae is an important tool for maintaining social order. The ability to read between the lines and understand someone’s honne even when they are expressing tatemae is an important social skill in Japan.

Illustrations of the real and the real

Why are Honne and Tatemae Important in Japanese Culture?

The concepts of honne and tatemae are deeply rooted in Japanese culture, which places great value on social harmony and maintaining good relationships with others. Here are some reasons why these concepts are so important:

Maintaining relationships: By using tatemae, Japanese people can avoid conflict and maintain harmonious relationships with others, even if they do not completely agree with that person's opinions.

Respecting hierarchy: This concept also relates to the strong social hierarchy in Japanese society. People who are younger or in a lower position tend to use tatemae when speaking to people who are older or in a higher position.

Taking care of your face: Tatemae also serves to maintain one's "face" or reputation. By displaying a polite and courteous attitude, one can maintain the dignity of oneself and one's group.

Examples of Applying Honne and Tatemae in Daily Life

At work: An employee may feel dissatisfied with his job (honne), but in front of his superiors, he will show a positive and enthusiastic attitude (tatemae).

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Imagine a Japanese employee who is asked by his boss to work overtime even though he is actually very tired and wants to go home. His honne might be the desire to refuse and take a break, but his tatemae is to agree and work overtime with a friendly smile. He does this not because he is dishonest, but because he understands the importance of teamwork, obedience to superiors, and maintaining good relationships in the workplace. Refusing directly would be considered rude and disruptive to team harmony.

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In friendship: A friend may feel annoyed by another friend's behavior, but he will try to remain friendly and polite in front of others (tatemae).

In the family: A child may not want to do household chores, but he will still do them because his parents ask him to (tatemae).

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The use of honne and tatemae is highly context-dependent. In formal situations, such as business meetings or meetings with strangers, tatemae is more prevalent. Conversely, in informal situations with trusted people, honne is more frequently expressed. The ability to switch smoothly between honne and tatemae reflects one's social sophistication and adaptability in Japanese society.

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The development of the concepts of honne and tatemae

Over time, the concepts of honne and tatemae have evolved. Younger generations of Japanese, especially in urban settings, tend to be more open and direct in expressing their honne, while still maintaining politeness. However, the use of tatemae remains important in many social and professional contexts.

Misunderstandings often occur between foreigners and Japanese people due to differences in understanding of honne and tatemae. What may be considered dishonest or hypocritical by foreigners may be expressions of tatemae aimed at maintaining harmony and avoiding conflict. Conversely, foreigners who are too direct and open in expressing their honne may be considered rude or impolite by Japanese people.

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Conclusion

The concept of honne and tatemae is one of the most fascinating aspects of Japanese culture. Understanding these concepts can help us better appreciate the complexity and nuances of Japanese social interactions. Although they may seem contradictory at times, honne and tatemae actually complement each other and form a balance in Japanese social life.

Understanding honne and tatemae is not just about learning two Japanese words, but about understanding the cultural values ​​and social etiquette that underlie them. It is about learning to read between the lines, appreciate the nuances in communication, and adapt to different social contexts. With a better understanding of these two concepts, interactions with Japanese people will become smoother, more effective, and more rewarding. Indeed, learning honne and tatemae is a long journey into understanding the complexities of Japanese culture and human behavior, a journey filled with nuances and subtleties that requires patience and sensitivity. However, the effort will be rewarded with a deeper understanding and greater appreciation for the richness of Japanese culture.

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